June 26, 2016
Partly Sunny with a Chance of Regret
- Genesis 9:8-13
- Dr. Donald R. Durrett
Opening Statement:
A few weeks ago Teri invited me to preach on this Sunday. Some of you might remember, for several years each June I preached on love and marriage. When I got home I told Nancy that Teri asked me to preach. She asked me, “What are you going to preach about?” I told her “Regrets.” She replied, “Whatever happened to love and marriage?” I told her, “Nothing has happened to love and marriage.” Next week, July 1st, we will celebrate 58 years!
It’s good to be back with you again! As I look out I see many new faces and many familiar faces of friends sitting in the same places.
Introduction:
I titled today’s sermon, “Partly Sunny With a Chance of Regrets” because for the most part you and I live life “sunny side up.” We are deeply privileged and blessed, with untold opportunities in health care, housing, education and employment. For us, the glass is not half-full or half-empty. The glass is always refillable.
While we are blessed we are not immune from having some regrets; something we did, something we said, some major wrong decision. If anyone says “I have no regrets” he probably needs to get out more!
Story:
Sinister comic W.C. Fields and his wife were in divorce court when she went into a tirade, saying, “You’re useless, a lazy bum, and most of all, a no good drunk.” He looked at her and replied, “My only regret, my dear, is I never thanked you for leading me to drink!”
We all join with Frank Sinatra in singing, “Regrets, I’ve had a few.” I confess to you a few of my regrets:
1. Not having learned a practical modern language.
2. Not having served in the military.
3. Not having spent more time with my aging parents.
4. Not giving out more “thank you’s” and “I love you’s.”
5. Not being tall dark and handsome – then one day I concluded two for three was acceptable!
Sometimes regrets are often life’s way of pointing us in the right direction. Fortunately, they are limited to this lifetime.
All of us would like the opportunity to go back to re-do something we did or said, to repair our mistakes. Poet Louise Tarkington wrote: “I wish there was some wonderful place called, ‘the land of beginning again’ where all our heartache and mistakes could be dropped at the door like an old shabby coat and never put on again. I wish there was some wonderful place called, “The Land of Beginning Again!”
The Bible is filled with stories of regret:
1. Adam and Eve regretted eating the forbidden fruit.
2. Moses regretted killing the guard of Pharoah.
3. David regretted his adulteress affair with Bathsheba.
4. Paul regretted persecuting the Christians.
5. Peter regretted denying Jesus.
Did Jesus have any regrets? Did he regret choosing Judas as a disciple? Did he regret going to Jerusalem, or remaining silent at his trial? Even God regretted destroying the earth and its’ inhabitants – per today’s Old Testament lesson. “Never again shall flesh be cut off by the waters of the flood and the earth be destroyed.”
In today’s New Testament lesson, because Paul cared for the Christians at Corinth, he took a risk in sending them a letter of rebuke for their misconduct and lack of obedience. He did so to demonstrate the principle that Christians should care for one another because God in Christ has given to each of us the care for one another.
Paul took no pleasure in his action. His intention was not to cause pain, not to knock them down, but to lift them up and encourage them. While Paul was troubled in having to discipline the people, he did not regret it because it led to repentance, obedience and a change of heart.
Social scientists tell us our regrets are divided into two age groups. If you are under 50 years of age you are more likely to regret something you did or said. If you are over 50, you are more likely to regret something you did not do or say:
1. Roads not taken.
2. Mountains not climbed.
3. Dreams not pursued.
a. Not finishing school.
b. Not choosing the right vocation.
c. Not spending enough quality time with loved ones.
d. Not putting forth my best effort or discipline.
e. Not taking enough risks.
In a recent interview Peyton Manning said, “I had a wonderful career of 25 years. I have no regret of all of those years because I disciplined myself and I did my very best.” Through his example and the examples of many like him, be it in sports, music, education, science or parenting, we learn an important lesson – the pain of hard work and discipline are never as great as the pain of regret.
I love the rather clever and humorous story called “The Regret Family Trip.” One family member told it in this way:
Parable of the Regret Family … ‘I had really not planned to take a trip this year, yet, I found myself packing anyway. And off I went. I was on another trip – a guilt trip. I booked a flight on “Wish I Had Airlines.” I didn’t check my bags – everyone carried their own bags in this trip. I had to drag my bags through the Regret City Airport. People from all over the world were there with me, limping along under the weight of bags they had packed themselves. I caught a cab to The Last Resort Hotel where the Annual Pity Party would be held. As I checked in I saw that all my old colleagues were there – The Done family – Coulda, Shoulda, and Woulda. Both members of the Opportunity family were also there – Missed and Lost.
Coming late to the party were the newest members of the family – I Waited Too Long. Shattered Dreams and Broken Promises were there, along with their friends, Don’t Blame Me and I Couldn’t Help It. Hours of entertainment were provided by the renowned story teller – It’s Their Fault! As I prepared to settle in for a long night I realized that one person had the power to send all those people home and break up the party – me. All I had to do was stop living in the past and welcome the new day.
Unfortunately for many, their regrets become their personal oasis, where they take refuge and drink from the well of “what if” or “what might have been.” Words John Greenleaf Whittier wrote – “are the saddest words of pen or tongue.”
Unfortunately, many tend to stay too long in their pain, living with tired dreams and a haunting past. They rock back and forth in the rocking chair of regret, repeating the terms of surrender. For them, tomorrow’s forecast is always going to be “Partly Sunny With a Chance of Regret.”
As people of faith, we search for courage to let go of “what might have been” so that we might passionately pursue what is yet to be. The poet wrote: “In every life there comes a time to walk in shadows and in sunlight, to hear silence and song, to shed tears of sadness and joy, to forget what might have been and remember what is!” Wouldn’t it be wonderful if each of us had a small cemetery plot in our yards where we could go and bury our mistakes. Holding on to some regret is like always having a rock in your shoe. As long as you have a rock in your shoe, you will always limp through life. We take that rock and leave it at the cross.
The best way to deal with our regrets is to move on from the past, focusing on today – to appreciate memories, sacred moments, to live with purpose and intention, never letting our regrets determine our identity or our destiny.
William Borden, heir to the Borden Dairy Estate became an instant millionaire in 1904 when he graduated from high school. His long desire was to travel the world. What was originally intended to be a trip of pleasure and exotic experiences became a trip of moral conscience and deep soul searching as he witnessed hunger, pain, poverty, illiteracy, neglect and abuse.
His became a story of transformation. He wrote home, “I’m going to give my life in service to the mission of Christ, to help bring relief from suffering!” He wrote in the back of his Bible – “NO RESERVES.” He returned home and graduated from Yale University. He maintained his passion for missions. He wrote in the back of his Bible – “NO RETREATS.” Upon completing his studies at Princeton Theological Seminary, he set sail for India and China. Enroute he stopped in Egypt where he became gravely ill with cerebral meningitis. Within a few months he died. A wasted life you say? Not in God’s plan! In his Bible, during his illness under the words NO RESERVES and NO RETREATS he had written the words – NO REGRETS!
Jesus teaches us no matter the situation, no matter the darkness of the hour, he always moved forward. Today, he encourages each of us to do the same. He has forgiven our regrets and mistakes. Now we must forgive ourselves. We hear the encouraging words of the Apostle Paul, “Forgetting what lies behind, and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on to the mark of my calling in Jesus Christ my Lord.”
Conclusion:
Life is too short, time is too precious, and the stakes are too high to live with our regrets. The beauty of life is that while we cannot undo what is done, we can see it, try to learn from it, understand it and change, so that our every moment is not spent in anger, guilt or regret, but in wisdom, love and peace!
I appreciate the opportunity to preach today! I hope you haven’t regretted it!
Amen and Amen!
Dr. Donald R. Durrett
Summer of 2016